Dealing with Difficult people
Scripture:
“If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.” — Romans 12:18
Reflection:
I’ve met a lot of spiritually abrasive individuals in my life. At this point, it feels like a talent — I attract them the way bees find flowers. And it’s not a pretty sight. The moment I meet them, I can feel the Holy Spirit grieving inside me. And I know it’s not my own feelings, because I truly don’t care enough to grieve a nasty attitude. I’ve mastered the art of being unbothered so well that it irritates people. So no, I’m not grieving their spirit — that’s God letting me know something is off.
People will try your spirit before noon. They will stretch your patience, poke your peace, and audition for a role in your sanctification journey. But here’s the thing: you don’t have to accept every role. You can decline by protecting your peace. Dismiss. Distance. Mind your business.
People often ask me how I manage to do everything I do, and my answer is always the same: minding my business. We all get 24 hours. If seven of them belong to a job, the remaining seventeen are yours to steward. And I choose to use my time wisely — in me, my faith, my family, my business, my hobbies, my life. I leave no room for anyone to drag their chaos into my personal life.
Yes, the Word of God calls us to be good, patient, and kind — especially toward those experiencing what I call a spiritual malaise. But let me also tell you this: don’t try to be God. Read the verse again. If it is possible. If you can keep your peace, keep it. Whatever you must do to guard that peace, do it.
If you can ignore, ignore.
If you can smile, smile.
If you need to step back, step back.
Protect your peace, your soul, and your spirit at all times. That’s part of walking with God.
And the truth is: Difficult people don’t always change — but you can change how you show up.
God never asked you to absorb chaos. He asked you to guard your heart.
He never asked you to match someone’s dysfunction. He asked you to walk in wisdom.
He never asked you to fix people. He asked you to stay faithful.
Sometimes the holiest thing you can do is not engage.
Sometimes the most spiritual response is silence.
Sometimes the most Christlike act is a firm boundary.
Difficult people reveal what’s unhealed in them — not what’s wrong with you.
Believe me, I go through it all the time. And yes, sometimes it gets to me. Sometimes I feel anger rise. And because I won’t act on it, I bring my complaint to God. I tell Him exactly how I feel. And He calms me down and reminds me: Vengeance is His.
Your job is not to carry their storm.
Your job is not to take your own justice.
Your job is to keep your peace.
Meditation:
Lord, help me respond with clarity instead of reaction.
Help me protect the peace You gave me, not the chaos they bring.
Teach me when to speak, when to stay silent, and when to walk away.
Application for Today:
Don’t match their energy — manage your own.
Don’t take their behavior personally — it’s not about you.
Don’t negotiate with dysfunction — set the boundary.
Don’t lose your peace — guard it like treasure.
Prayer:
Father, give me the strength to deal with difficult individuals without losing myself.
Give me wisdom to respond with grace, courage to set boundaries, and peace that cannot be shaken.
Amen.
